Saturday, April 7, 2012

133rd Post - Guarding My Heart

"By Thy grace, O God, I will go nowhere this day where Thou canst not come, nor court any companionship that would rob me of Thine. By Thy grace I will let no thought enter my heart that might hinder my communion with Thee, nor let any word come from my mouth that is not meant for Thine ear. So shall my courage be firm and my heart be at peace."

John Baillie (1886–1960), Scottish theologian and Church of Scotland minister 

This prayer was exactly what I needed as I sit in the Saturday between Good Friday and Easter Sunday extremely discouraged.
Life has been chaotic. We've sold our condo, packed and moved. My energy was fabulous up until the unpacking part. I'm surrounded by boxes, yet am almost paralyzed in the contemplation of where to put my stuff. I have taken up every distraction possible to avoid the task of organizing. My poor dear reverend does not do chaos well: sadly I am not the best of helpmates in restoring order. 

My biggest distraction, however is not our move, not Easter, not even dealing with the disappointment of being away from our children and grandchildren during this holiday. My biggest distraction is the continued labour unrest between my teachers union and our government. 

I know! Seriously - politics is distracting me! I have been consumed with following the newest, latest, and greatest updates. Where, oh where is truth? Where, oh where is the sanity? My position is unchanged from my last post. (Click here if you haven't read it yet) I continue to be stuck in the middle or so it seems. 

So what does that have to do with John Baillie's prayer? EVERYTHING. My thoughts  have been racing, pithy retorts have been forming in my heart, unkind words that sit on the edge of my mouth needed a check. As I continue in this conflict, as I endeavor to be understood, I must be true to my calling. I must continue to live in peace. We are of this world, but this world is not my home. Have no fear, I will not be moving into the 'being so heavenly minded, I'm no earthly good', realm.

This prayer brings me back to the the main thing. As I keep my mind stayed on Him, my courage will be firm and my heart will be at peace.

Blessings to all as we celebrate Easter, a time of renewal and hope. 


  1. Oh poor you. I also hate boxes especially when kids get into them and make a mess which then I really don't want to touch This happened in my house with promises they would clean it up and I'm still waiting 20 years Guess who has to do it.
    Living on this earth, believe it or not, is a precious gift.
    Knowing how to live, is what we were put here to discover and learn :)
    I hope you enjoy your few days of peace and I am sorry this school situation is taking so long to resolve.

  2. I recognized that prayer right away, Carol. I have had and used Baillie's A Diary of Private Prayer for several decades.

    Moving is always a challenge — and more challenging as one gets older. I hope this process lands you and your reverend is a good space. Once things are less chaotic.

    Easter blessings and Bear hugs!

  3. Hi Lady! We had a good day of tackling boxes yesterday. A feeling of satisfaction and a little less chaos. Happy Easter to you and your family!
    Sandie - Happy Easter to you as well. I continue to enjoy your posts! You're awesome!
    Rob - Baillie was new to me. How can that be? As they say better late than never. I'm going to hunt down A Diary of Private Prayer - sounds good. I suspect my dear old rev has it sitting on a newly unpacked bookshelf somewhere. Thanks for your encouragement Rob! Happy Easter.

  4. It sounds like such a challenging time for you, Carol! Just by itself, moving is really so physically and emotionally exhausting. I hope you can get some rest -- and feel some renewed peace -- today -- or soon!